Thursday, July 28, 2005

Blogging, Carrie Bradshaw, Masculinity and Market Corrections

Recently being hoisted into this blog world on the local tip has inspired the thrust of this entry. I’m stressed out and vent through passionate keyboard strikes.

Out last night with my new DC blog world and in conjunction with pent up stress I explored some of my contemporaries’ websites, blogs and recent entries to see what others used these forums for.

“As many as the stars” Kevin Costner telling Indian dude that when asked how many white people he was expecting to come over to their land.

Don’t even get me started on white people. I must focus.

“Control, you must learn control” Yoda

So that’s the deal with the blogs? As many as the stars one day, however can one differentiate?

Again this is not a diary rather a tool to continually hone me in to the art that has replaced basketball and massages my stress. At the end of the day basketball just like writing more than anything is an outlet.

Number 1 regarding blogs: Allot of Carrie Bradshaw wanna bee’s out there. Listen sex in the city has passed; they’ve already done that series and writing a Sex & the City esque blog is like buying E-Toys in late two thousand. Not to say this multitude of social critique, dating and men are from mars women Venus shit doesn’t hold merit it’s just a bit boring -2- me. Again it’s already been done.

That of course has nothing to do with the pizza crust of my crease. If your creased your perturbed and right now even though the sizzling heat wave has laxed it’s grip and dropped the thermo twenty degrees I’m angry.

What was alarming to me reading through these many blogs about girls, guys, dating and the many proverbial what ifs, continual questioning of the rules was something awful. Something terrible has raised its head at the Yale club. This man is worse than a thief.

Clawing through the infinite responses that these obviously popular female forums provided were a litany of male responses that disgusted me which brings me to my next point, market corrections.

I saw too many male responses that were A) reading this and B) publicly responding. But C) too often too many men to serve what purpose I don’t know would echo female sentiments when giving their two (I’m working the 2’s!) sense. I saw way too much of guys have feelings too. Way too many examples of self proclamation of being dorky and having feelings. Now dork as a word is almost as hot as bananas three months ago (note: if you still say bananas after Gwen’s track, you’re played) but that’s the thing, guys don’t say it. Carrie Bradshaw yes, Terrell Owens, no.

It was so unbelievable it got me thinking about this recent market trend of metro sexualism and me as the original doing way too much to propagate before it got big and now as it stands today not enough to narrow the gap, market corrections.

Don’t get me wrong in some senses I was the original metro sexual, raised essentially by three girls and two mothers male influences were scarce. What’s funny is that any of these “dork”or “sensitive” guys, I would run the gambit on if a conversation ever came up about oh shall we say General Hospital. Frisco, Felicia, Tony Tanya and Luke and Laura there are few girls in the world that can exceed my General Hospital knowledge from the nineteen eighties. Having such a strong and impeccable foundation in conjunction with the nature of soaps I could watch it tomorrow and still have a vague yet thorough understanding of what the fuck was going on in Port Charles. I was an ABC kid through and through so don’t sleep on my All My Children and One Life To Live knowledge as well. Sonny from GH in the late eighties was Nikko a sassy club owner on All My Children. I could go on forever and love the Mary J track were she loops the As the World Turns riff. I think that’s right although it could be guiding light or Ryan’s Hope.

My sister was a nasty singles figure skater and I again know more than your average female about axels, towallies, toe and triple loop jumps. Katarena Witt was second only to Cindy Mancini in regards to the first time my Jimmy went high noon. I got my first manicure and massage with gambling profits from my book operation as a junior in high school and was light years ahead of the pink explosion, quite simply because I rocked it for so long that when it exploded I was there. Pink cuff links and pink Kango colluding with slick banter and never stuttering, ah! Rat pack, motif, ADD, holla.

What I’m trying to say is that I’m part female, I’ve always have been and will continue to be me.

But it’s flowing out of me now after my readings this afternoon, the shit has gone too far and the environment and world as we no it are primed for a market correction.

To the dork fellas with “feelings” hey we all have them but don’t talk about them publicly, be a man not a faggot. This trend is over and be hip to the fact that it sucks being the last on the deal team. I’m helping you out, be a man not a faggot, girls will like you better, trust me. Now the tee hungers out there might sweat the impulse to lambaste me over my use of the dreaded F word. To my gay brothers and sisters all love, soon you will be all legally married and to this day you are the funniest most bizarre and caring group of cat I’ve ever broke bread with.

When I say faggot I’m referring to these god dam cock sucking metrosexuals. It’s over and the only reason this correction is happening quicker than you might think is because it has become absurd. My mother once started a screenplay in the early nineties and the treatment went like this –

The year is 2085 and the whole world is gay.

I lost it right there – and to think she was kind of on point judging solely on heavy recent market trends.

And I’ll still get my nails done as always with the Harlem 1923 clear polish. I’ll still astonish crowds with my gall and impetus to dance like its 1999!

“Just love Prince” Vivian – Pretty Women.

Guys for the love of god, with the country at war and the threat of terror pervading our domestic sands inching closer by the day I urge you to take your penises back! Their yours, and you don’t have to have girth to be big and or have a sack

“It takes a village to raise a child.” Hillary Clinton

Bull shit Hillary all’s that it takes is a set of balls and my male brethren needs to take it back like Mouth in Gonnies underneath the wishing well.

“I’m taken em all back.” Mouth

And for those of you wondering who the hell this kid is ……

“Take me back to town, you’ll find out pretty fast.” Pony Boy the Outsiders.

This blog shit is wonderful. I’ll always take weed heads over violent drunks, tree huggers that like their chronic over the ignorant drunk with a temper and I’ll always take a writer over any other form of expression and that’s just me.

That’s discounting freestyle rap of course. I’m not going to tease and muse you about the crew and recent rat pack developments, nope – no one deserves this until we get this shit straight. Gay is gay word is bond, 1. However dudes need to clap back at themselves.

“You better check yourself before you wreck yourself.” Ice Cube.

Shit has gone too far and typically that’s when Yoda himself (Alan Greenspan) predicts corrections. One might say metrosexuals as of late have behaved with an “irrational exuberance”

I’m here to check that. Quite simply because I’m allowed to. I’m not some good old boy watching dukes of hazards re-runs flying confederate flags talken bout “lychen them faggots.” I’m a white /black brother raised by girls schooled an ABC daytime dynamite totally down with the masterful art of figure skating. I get my nails done, cry all of the time and know what a banana clip is, eighties and am not against blasting back street boy, I want it that way, tell me why!!!!!!!!!

However, I’m true to my dawgs and will floss that which needs to be wetted. If you don’t follow than put down the drowning of dorkenss and cop some early Ghetto boys and within that rap super group fiend some interest in all of Mr. Scarfaces solo works.

That’s it – no book tonight. I have a flight tomorrow to the hub and a happy hour after work which is usually black out central on the twilight zone tip. We’re brokers and traders and that’s how happy hours play out in that world. Having spent the last ten years strictly in Boston, New York, Chicago, Honolulu and LA
I can earnestly say this is the not the first (I shall not be so presumptuous in an information age) but a part of the greater whole instigating this market correction. I wish we could trade this shit.

Don’t be that dude. One to all though and write, blog out,

“oh my god like I can’t believe howfat Britney is”

she’s pregnant asshole. – mimicking that suburban snotty, clueless OHMY GOD voice is a pastime hobby. However go to the Apple that’s mega big these days and you’ll hear plenty of dude’s yappen like that.

Go grab Gangstarr and instead of Calgone let DJ. Premiere take you away.

I apologize for the hiatus but it’s hard to imagine what my life is like from a personal day to day, ADD panic horrible slash magnificent slash MANIC perspective. For my audience not to reveal any more Sons of Liberty, Legendes but I’ll Chantilly you (remember that means lace) with a favorite poem that I wrote on my twenty first birthday that was spent in a rehabilitation center after a horrific accident that nearly took my life (again) and humbled me eternally while also officially stripping me of my captain status for my senior year basketball campaign at Curry College in Milton MA. It was so hard because I’ve never felt better about myself when decreed as a captain but I was coming off a semester in Hawaii and I had collectively turned into Jim Morrison, not good.

From my hospital bed in a body cast.

It is today that I realized that I’m not a captain
Unable to conform to recognized leader standards

Just a fresh breath of air am I, for a captain’s sacred lung
Floating anonymously watching my song slowly being sung
Identifying personal shortcomings, humbling at best

Forgive me dear mother and father for I’m no better than the rest

Weaknesses arise as pressures surmount
Captain’s draw strength from pressure

Where we all captains once upon a day?
Has passing time slowly sifted most away?

It is to heaven that I turn to find my place
I give my world to the lord of heavens grace
You have given me breath, as long as I’m here
I will brunt the struggles until my purpose becomes clear

Our lord grants to some long aging life
Time is Wisdom

As time goes by, one day I’ll see
All of the captains that have surrounded me

A moment of clarity…..

Mom always told me not to be stubborn

Cee – 5/22/98

1 comment:

HungryEyes said...

'Silly Faggot, Dicks are for Chicks' - Trix Rabbit.

From one Captain to another the lyrical banter I just absorbed made me have FEELINGS that I will keep to myself for fear of being labeled a 'Faggot'. So, my captain, I shall give you my thoughts. I enjoy the layers you peel away from yourself as you move further down the road to your consciousness. On my travels through my mind, pondering life, I come up with the answers daily, but then scratch my head and they all disappear. What I can tell you, from a captains experience, I wear my feelings on my sleeve and on my face when I see you dance, and laugh out loud with you. Then my questions get answered by an arm around my shoulder and I figure it's the feeling of friendship, comroderie, same, happy, goodness, soul-stuff that I feel about - but will only tell you I think about - or for that matter - won't tell you at all - who needs to justify frienship with feelings? Your compelling arrangement leads me to let you know I think you are a true captain - a bruther frum a different mutha and a different cula - but a brother is the end - a friend. So, I look forward to another BLOG, I like the way you think and feel!